The new print edition of Bark magazine just came out and I just re-read the latest installment "The Chloe Chronicles," which I handed in about three weeks before Chloe died. In this piece, I wrote about how Chloe was slowing down and showing signs of aging. I wrote about how I was starting to worry that some day she might get sick and die. I had no idea she was actually quite sick, yet as I re-read the piece, the signs are there.
I don't know how to react. I could feel ashamed and horrified that I treated her "signs of aging" so lightly; or I could feel awed that, at some level, we got to say goodbye in such a deep way.
What awes me most is the pull-quote Bark chose to use. A few months ago, when I expressed my concerns about Chloe that I wouldn't be able to handle it if she got sick, she said (telepathically, of course): "Don't worry. We are together now. That's all that matters. And when the time comes, you will still be with me and I will be with you."
Thank you, Bark magazine, for publishing The Chloe Chronicles and allowing me to honor her in this way.